Five Minute Friday - Want

Five Minute Friday

I learned about Five Minute Friday years ago when it was under the leadership of Lisa-Jo Baker. Now, it is captained by Kate Motaung over at Heading Home. Be sure to click the button below and join in this freeing experience of writing on a topic for five minutes, unedited, just writing, not worrying, spilling out of your heart what the prompt inspires. Come on, you can do it! Let your heart fly through your fingers freely for five minutes, link up, and then visit the person that linked up before you.



This week's word is: Want.

Want…I want to be free, free of the fear that has been instilled in me since I was a little girl. Not good enough. She does this better than you. Your bumble bee craft isn't the best. She sings better than you. She's younger.  I choose her.

I want to be free to know that I am loved and to love fully in return, to have no doubts. To be able to go out in public without how inadequate and imperfect I am being rubbed in my face and ripping out my heart.

I want to have value to those that say they love me. Heavenly Father showed my value to Him when He sent His son to die for my sins. Yes, *my* sins, just as he did for yours. I am not some incurable plague. I do have value. I got a God-said on that one and that God-said came in the form of a man nailed to a tree. If I am worth that much to Him, who are you to determine my value? And why is it so important to me to be valued by you, a mortal human, when that God-said is for eternity?

I want an answer to the questions and an end to the fear and heartache and uncertainty. I want and need a place of heart safety here on this earth. I want to be free of the fear of desertion.

I have His love. I want His peace.

*****

Now, it's your turn. Respond in a blog post of your own and join the linky over at Kate's page or answer in the comments. The choice is yours.

Have a blessed day!

Wednesday Hodgepodge - 4 May 2016

1. What's something fun you're looking forward to on your May calendar?

We are looking forward to having the girls home from school, even though it will only be about a week for our youngest.

2. What are some images that come to mind when you hear the word mother?

Babies come to mind and how happy I was to have mine.

Sadness, too, because I didn't have the relationship that I would like to have had with my mother growing up, nor did I have the relationship that I wanted with my mother-in-law. Some of us were just born unwanted by mother figures.

3. What's something beautiful you own or have seen that's made of glass?

Our wedding cake top was beautiful. It was a very detailed glass cake top. Unfortunately, it got broken during a move.

4. Was today typical? If not what made it unusual?

Oh my, what a question after the morning we've had! Read about that in this post: What a Day!

5. What is a quality you wish you could have more of?

I wish that I could have more self-confidence. David and many others say that I am my own worst critic. While I don't think that is true, - I've heard people be meaner to me than I have been to me! - I am very critical of anything that I do because I lack self-confidence and have a big helping of fear of failure.

6. What's the next major purchase you need to make? Will it happen in the month of May?

We need new tires for the car, and no, it will not likely happen in the month of May, unfortunately.

7. What responsibility/job/work did you dislike while growing up but has proved helpful to you as an adult?

I've never liked washing dishes, especially forks. It has proven helpful to me as an adult because I know how to wash dishes and we can eat somewhat safely because the dishes are clean.

8. Insert your own random thought here.

How do those bugs fly all hooked together like that? I have seen zillions of what I call "love bugs" flying everywhere. They are all over the place in my most recent Queen Anne's lace pictures. One landed on me the other day. I don't think that it stung me. I don't even know if they have stingers. Either way, I haven't swollen or turned 40 shades of purple yet.

Please also visit David's first Wednesday Hodgepodge post over at: Random Thoughts and Observations!

Thanks!

Wednesday Hodgepodge - 18 November 2015

1. What's surprised you most about your life or about life in general?

I guess what surprised me the most is the fact that I ever got married. I figured it would never, ever happen for someone like me. Since I didn't think that anyone would ever marry me, I also didn't think that I would ever have babies. David and I have been married for thirty-one years now and I am thankful for all of my beautiful babies.


2. Among others, these ten words were added to the Oxford English Dictionary this year...awesomesauce, beer o'clock, brain fart, buttdial, cat cafe (apparently this is a real thing), fatberg (gross-read the definition here), fat shame, hangry, Mx (gender neutral), and skippable.

Your thoughts? In looking over the list, which word do you find most ridiculous? Which word would you never in a million years say out loud? Which word would you be most likely to use in conversation?

Hangry and skippable are alright by me, and I kind of like the idea of a cat café (assuming that the definition that I found is actually what it really means! http://www.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/english/cat-cafe). I love cats. "Buttdial" has become a way of life around here as folks are always calling us that way. We've heard some very interesting conversations due to this. I think several of the other words sound either crude or downright rude.


3. Do you like gravy? Is there a food you'd rather not eat unless it comes with gravy? Do you make your own or buy the canned or store-made variety? Turkey and gravy, sausage gravy, mashed potatoes and gravy, country ham and red eye gravy, biscuits and chocolate gravy, pot roast and gravy...which one on the list is your favorite?

I love gravy! I would be one guilty of having everything swimming in gravy. However, we buy the jarred or packet variety because I still have not mastered making home-made gravy. If you want gravy that you can slice, I have you covered!


4. Do you have a plan? Do you need a plan? Have you ever had a plan fall into a trillion pieces? Explain.

I always have a plan, but there is always something in motion to show me that I shouldn't have bothered with a plan in the first place. Things very rarely actually come together as planned.

A prime example would be our twenty-eighth wedding anniversary. We saved all year to go out and splurge on that anniversary weekend…hotel, nice dinner, and the works. The day before our anniversary, David was admitted to the hospital, on death's door, and entered our anniversary with one less body part due to the amputation of one of his toes. He came out of surgery just before midnight, just in time for us to bring in our anniversary together. This started two months of stays in hospitals and a nursing home, not at all what we had planned for our anniversary.


5. November 19 is National Play Monopoly Day. Do you own the original or some version of the game? Do you enjoy playing Monopoly? How likely is it you'll play a game of Monopoly on November 19th? Ever been to Atlantic City? Ever taken a ride on a railroad? Is parking in your town free? Last thing you took a chance on?

I like to play Monopoly, but not necessarily for as long as it takes to play the game all the way through. In the past, we've had the original game, but now we have the My Little Ponyversion and we enjoy playing it with our children (now all adults) whenever they are home.
It is unlikely that we will play it on November 19 as none of our kids will be home then.

I have never been to Atlantic City. I have ridden the trains in various theme parks, if that counts. I have been in real train cars, but not while the trains were operating. If there is paid parking in this town anywhere, we haven't come across it. Everywhere that we park is free. Driving to Corpus Christi, I guess, would have to be the last thing I took a real chance on. I just knew I would have to drive across horrendously long bridges out to the island, but it wasn't scary at all.


6. A song you like that has the word (or some form of the word) thanks in the title, lyrics, or meaning?

The Old Rugged Cross has been my favorite hymn since childhood. It very much speaks of thankfulness for the sacrifice made for our salvation, for the gift that Heavenly Father gave to us.



7. In keeping with this month's theme of gratitude....what is something you're taking for granted that when you stop and think about it, you're grateful for?

At this point in my life, I can't think of anything that I take for granted. However, during my childhood, I would have to say that I took my grandparents being alive for granted. I never imagined life without them and thought they'd always be there. Obviously, no one lives forever and they were no exception. I am very thankful for the time that I had my grandparents in my life, for the lessons that they taught me, and most of all for the love that they freely gave to me.


8. Insert your own random thought here.

More of a question than a thought… Why does life have to be such a challenge for someone in my age group? I turned fifty this year and that in itself doesn't really bother me. What bothers me is being compared to 20-somethings and always falling short, regardless of my knowledge or experience or their lack thereof.

Also, am I the only one that gets indigestion from just drinking water? If I laced it with jalapenos, I would understand. But just drinking plain old Dasani or any other bottled water gives me indigestion. The tap water here causes an entirely different problem!



NOTE: The My Little Pony link above is an affiliate link. If you click the link and purchase the My Little Pony Monopoly game via that link, we will financially benefit from the transaction. Thank you for your support of PS Annie! Have a blessed weekend!

Book of Me: Favorite Color

This week's prompt is - Favourite Colour

Do you have a favourite colour? and if so why?
Do you like vibrant colours or darker colours?
Do you associate anyone with a particular colour? If so who and why ?
Does your favourite colour reflect your personality?


I have a very hard time pinning down a favorite color. My favorite color really depends on what I'm needing the color for. My absolute favorites are black, pink, and red, but I also love earth tones. Yellow, red, and orange flowers are absolutely beautiful, but so is a sweet pink rose and a long awaited bluebonnet. In my clothing, I tend to lean more towards darker and quieter colors. In furniture and household woodwork, I prefer the darker woods over the lighter woods.

I often battle depression, so black would be a good reflection of my personality. All of my pants are black. Green, however, has always been the color that looks best on me. I rarely wear it, though. I never seem to be able to find a shade of it that I like when I've gone shopping for clothes.

I associate three colors with three people that I love very much. These colors are associated with them forever in my mind because they are their favorite colors. Our oldest daughter loves red; our youngest son loves yellow; and our baby girl has always had a thing for purple. I grew up not being too terribly fond of yellow or purple (and orange was just downright icky to me), but my youngest two have taught me the beauty of yellow and purple. Together, they make one of my favorite flowers.

David says his favorite color is rainbow. That works!

Book of Me: Memory Board

1981-1982 Sweet 16  

Summer of 1981

David was prompted to write to me one morning by an unseen force that we believe to have been Heavenly Father. He was finally convinced that he needed to do it and he wrote to me. I was very surprised to get a letter from him. We spent awhile writing and then I got a letter saying that about the time I got the letter, he would be pulling down my driveway. That was how it happened, too!

First Date

Our first official date was on my 16th birthday, 18 August 1981. It was a Tuesday.. We went to see the movie "Endless Love". The song "Endless Love" has been our song since then.



Eleventh Grade at Crescent High School

I started the eleventh grade just after my sixteenth birthday. It was the year that I had Mrs. Anna Dean Pennington for US History. I still remember what she put on the board that first day of class: 1588. She said to remember it, that it would be on the final exam. I did and it was...I still remember it to this day, some thirty-two years later. It was the year of the defeat of the Spanish Armada by the British navy.

Health News

During Christmas vacation, I had my tonsils and adenoids removed. It was a very embarrassing time.
It was typical at the time do to pregnancy tests on all pubescent females prior to surgery to make sure
the girl wasn't pregnant. I wasn't pregnant, of course, and my mama was pretty adamant with them that
I was a good girl. David came to see me at the hospital. As he was leaving from his visit at the end of
visiting hours, he stepped into the elevator and I said "I love you" to him for the first time. The elevator
doors closed and he couldn't get them to open again and the guard wouldn't let him come back up in
the elevator to see me because visiting hours were officially over. It was just like the "The End" moment
in a movie that you didn't want to ever end.

News Headlines

The fifty-two Americans held hostage in Iran were released. President Ronald Reagan was shot by John Hinckley, Jr. Pope John Paul II was also shot that year.  Sandra Day O'Connor was the first woman appointed as a US Supreme Court Justice. Natalie Wood, the adorable little Susie from the original Miracle on 34th Street, died. Lady Diana and Prince Charles were married.

Luke and Laura got married on General Hospital. I watched this soap opera as well as One Life to Live
and All My Children after growing up watching The Doctors, Days of Our Lives and Another World.

For Your Eyes Only was a movie that played that year. We never saw it, but the song was popular and
we liked it. David wrote "For Your Eyes Only" on the outside of one of the letters that he sent to me
which, of course, prompted my mama to need to read it. Thankfully, it wasn't a smoochy letter. :)

I had many favorite songs when I was sixteen. Some of my favorite songs from 1981 and 1982 were:
Endless Love, Jessie's Girl, One That You Love, Kiss on My List, and Open Arms.

Driver's License

I was 16 years old when I first went to take the driver's license exam. I aced the written test, scoring
100%. However, the driving part of the test wasn't as successful. Parallel parking and backing up were
not my strong suits and are not to this day. When I had to do the parallel parking for the exam, the
examiner said that I hit the pylons. I never felt it hit and was convinced that he had a gas bubble or
something that popped as I was approaching the pylons. Anyway, I didn't get the license that day and
didn't try again until I was 18 years old, at which time I passed both tests just fine and got my license.

Will You Marry Me?

Friday, 1 January 1982 - David proposed to me on the steps of Flat Rock Baptist Church, Anderson SC.

The Junior Prom

We bought the tickets for the prom during my eleventh grade year, but at pretty much the last moment,
I decided that I just couldn't bear going. I was very shy. Poor David was just out all of that money,
because we couldn't get a refund on the tickets. I had a better time with him away from the prom than I
ever would have had being at the prom with a room full of people that were mean to me more often than
not.



Credits:
News Headline References: Like Totally 80s
http://www.liketotally80s.com/80s-capsules-1981.html

Meet Me on Monday by Acting Balanced

Questions:

1. Did you prank, get pranked or ignore April Fool's Day?

I got pranked and a big-time pranking it was! I have been waiting for ages for the release of the 1940 Census. Today, April 2, is the release date. One of the genealogy related blogs, RootDig, that I receive via e-mail sent out a note about a federal act that would keep it from being released without a presidential directive. ACK! I was all ready to send out a post of my own griping about this eleventh hour snatching, but I needed to go back to that blog e-mail to get the link for the offending Act. I clicked the link to be greeted by the fact that it was an April Fool's joke. Too funny! I'm glad that I hadn't posted my upset post! The only thing I can think of that would have been worse would be an e-mail saying that the depository housing the 1940 Census had burned. I would have been bawling my eyes out so hard that I wouldn't have been able to read the words "April Fool!" They got me good!

2. What is the most unusual thing you have in your pantry or refrigerator right now?

We have balloons in the freezer. Our youngest daughter makes balloon animals and these balloons have to be stored in the freezer before she makes them into animals.

3. If you were in the "Miss America" (or another) talent competition, what would your talent be?

If I were in the Miss America contest, I would have to say my biggest talent would be making people see something that isn't there, because if they saw what was there, I wouldn't be in the competition. :)

4. What is one thing you miss about being a kid?

The freedom to not worry about adult responsibilities. Worrying about how to clothe and feed people was for the grown-ups to worry about and I knew they'd take care of it. I also miss being able to zip around through the woods on my bicycle. That was lots of fun.

5. If you HAD to change your name, what would you change it to?

I would possibly change it to "Lily". "Suzanne" means lily and it is a flower that I like very much, especially tiger lilies.


Post the answers on your blog and link up below or respond in the comment section. Either way, I'd love to hear from you!

Meet Me on Monday with Acting Balanced

This Meet Me on Monday was started by Acting Balanced because we missed Java from Never Growing Old so very much! Please be sure to visit both sites.



Please be sure to click the button above to play along!

This week's questions:

1. How do you like your eggs?

I like them the most where the whites are cooked and the yolk is in a bubble that can be popped to make the yolk ooze everywhere. I also like them scrambled and boiled.

2. Who is the last person you spoke to on the phone?

I think that it was my youngest son, but at the moment I'm not positive.

3. Do you have a place you keep 'junk' in your home?

Yes.

4. What is on your 'spring cleaning' list?

We're working on doing the entire house and rearranging how we're using the rooms.

5. What blog post have you written recently that you'd like more people to know about? (don't forget to link it up)

It is a post on my One Thousand Gifts blog titled "Forgiveness". It is actually about a month old, but I haven't been too faithful with posting lately.

Saturday 9

1. Do you enjoy going to a casino now and again?

I've never been to one and don't really think that I would enjoy it. I don't enjoy a lot of noise or crowds.

2. What makes you happy most of the time?

Knowing that Heavenly Father is there for me makes me happy. My genealogy work, my family, and pretty flowers make me happy. There are frustrations that come along with each of these at times, but overall these things make me happy.

3. Are you jealous of someone right now?

In a manner of speaking, yes. But at this point it has gone beyond any jealousy over alienation of affection to downright loathing.

4. You're stranded on a desert island with one fictional character. Who is it? Why?

Eeyore would be my character of choice. He's the only one that I can think of that would understand my way of seeing things.

5. Have you ever been in the emergency room? If yes, for what (most recently)?

Yes, I have been many times for myself and with my children. The most recent time for myself was 18 June 2010. It was when they diagnosed severe anemia and the tumors.

6. Where is the last place you drove to just for fun?

I haven't been anywhere "just for fun" in ages. There are lots of places that I go to that are work-related that are fun sometimes. The last one was in Nacogdoches, TX.

7. If you were to make your living as a photographer, what would love to shoot?

I would love to be able to shoot beautiful landscapes, rural scenes, florals. I also would really enjoy photographing teeny-tiny things and making them look huge.

8. Tell us about a band you like that we might not have heard.

I don't know about any bands, per se. But one of my favorite is a one-woman wonder: Enya.

9. Where was the last place you went shopping? Why?

HEB was the last place that we went shopping. We had to buy groceries.

Five Minute Friday: Real

Please click the button above and be prepared to be inspired by The Gypsy Mama's writing. Join the rest of us as we write life five minutes at a time, unedited.

This week's prompt is: Real.

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Keeping it real; that's what me and my friends do. We share our hearts, the dark and the light. Nothing is too ugly to talk about, to learn from. We've had the love of a lifetime and we've lost it through death or divorce. We've had babies, schooled them, sent them off to war, and watched those babies have their own. We've loved our parents and said good-bye to them as they left this life. We've put Him on the cross and brought Him into our hearts. We've tested and been tested. We've been through it all and shared it all, the laughter and the tears.

Real is what we are, what we're meant to be. We live in the real and in the love that He gives us for each other.

We're living life, keeping it real, one day at a time.

Wednesday Hodgepodge

1. It's that most wonderful time of the year...tax season! Do you complete your own returns or farm that job out to the professionals?

My husband has a Master's Degree in Business Administration/Accounting & Finance, so he does them. I wouldn't touch them with a ten-foot pole!

2. This next question comes from Kansas Bob...he posed it in his response to something I asked in an earlier Wednesday post and I asked him if I could add it to the Hodgepodge some day. Today's the day....

Which do you think has changed you more-love or pain?

I'm thinking it is a mix of both, but pain has made the most obvious changes. Actual, to-the-core, hope is generally a thing of the past and laughs are few and far between. However, that trend seems to be changing and when I do laugh, it is a deeper, more true laugh than in the past.

3. Tangerine Tango has been named color of the year for 2012. Your thoughts? Would I find this color anywhere in your house? How about in your closet? If not, will you be adding this color to your life in some way in 2012? If you're not sure what tangerine tango looks like click here.

I'm allergic to citrus fruits and that carries over to home decor and clothing. :) I'm more into earth tones, blacks, and reds.

4. Are you a collector? What do you collect and does it get admired, used, and/or dusted regularly?

I collect angels and books. No, no, no in regards to the angels and yes, yes, no in regards to the books. The angels are in the living room and I rarely am in that part of the house. The books are here in the room with us.

5. February is National Heart Month...besides a green salad what is one tasty heart healthy dish you like to prepare?

Anything loaded with garlic would be our choice. Garlic helps to reduce blood pressure and that can't help but be a good thing for the heart.

6. When was the last time you had car trouble?

We had our last car trouble about a year ago, unless you want to count a flat tire. That happened on the way to take our daughter to class just a few months ago.

7. Have you been more demanding on yourself lately or less? Is that a good trend?

In some ways, yes, I have been more demanding of myself lately and I do think that it is a good thing. Rather than taking things at face value and assuming them to be the truth, I am digging deeper and looking for confirmation. This comes out the most in my genealogical research. Just because someone says A belongs to B doesn't mean that this A belongs to this B. There are a lot of factors that need to be considered and records to track down to prove the connection. It would be easiest to assume that all information that I was given was correct and let my research stop there. But, I need to go the distance and get that confirmation through legal papers and other fact comparisons.

8. Insert your own random thought here.

I do not like waiting. Most of my life I have been an impatient person. Over the last couple of years I have become a far more patient person. Until last night, that is. Someone dangled a blasted carrot that they know I want and now I have to wait to see if I can have the carrot. Hurry up and wait. OY! One problem with this particular dangler is that they dangle and then take it back without following through. I know this, but I can't help but get my hopes up each time, hoping that something will change for the better. I am determined, however, whether they follow through or not, I'll find a way to get that carrot with or without their assistance.

Diary of 5

I ran across this Diary of 5 meme just a couple of days ago and decided to give it a go. It is a companion to The Simple Woman's Daybook. Maybe you'd like to join in, too.

These prompts are to help us be more aware, through our 5 senses, of what is going on around us at any given moment.

I am seeing...a picture of someone's feet on my computer screen.

I am hearing...my husband telling funny stories to our youngest daughter.

I am smelling...not much of anything as I am very congested right now.

I tasted...peanut butter crackers and Diet Coke earlier today.

I am feeling...more stuffed than a turkey at Thanksgiving.

Wednesday Hodgepodge

Please be sure to click the button up there to join Joyce and her Wednesday Hodgepodge fun!

1. The NFL playoffs were held this past weekend and this year's Superbowl lineup will feature The New York Giants versus The New England Patriots. How do you define 'patriot'?

A patriot, in my opinion, is someone that is loyal to their country, no matter how stupid it might seem to be at the moment. They are willing to defend their country, at times risking their lives to do so. Like a parent to a child, a patriot loves their country, no matter what.

2. What's something in your life right now that feels like a 'giant'?

At this exact moment, the never ending headaches fit that description. Feeling secure is another.

3. What's the first thing that comes to mind when you think back to being 18?

YAY! I made it through school. I'm old enough to move out without permission and I'm about to get married!

4. Coconut-mashed potatoes-vanilla ice cream-mayonnaise...which white food would be the hardest to give up?

I wouldn't want to have to give up mashed potatoes. I don't eat coconut very often, so I wouldn't miss it. The same for vanilla ice cream. I would miss mayo only because I don't like dry sandwiches. I could live without it if I had to.

5. Describe an incident or a day you remember as the coldest you've ever experienced?

That would probably be a day back in South Carolina when our heater went out and it was in the single digit temperatures. The fan was running on the heater, but it wasn't putting out any heat. Even bundled up in blankets and coats and cuddled up together, we were very cold.

6. You're hosting a brunch...what's your favorite dish to prepare and serve?

I don't know what would be my favorite dish to prepare, but my husband's favorite things for me to make are custard pie and deviled eggs. I would probably opt for the deviled eggs and pray that the others liked them as much as my husband does.

7. How do you combat negative thinking?

I'm not very good at combating stinkin' thinkin'. It usually wins over any attempt to combat it.

8. Insert your own random thought here.

I was hoping to go to photograph a cemetery today but didn't get to because of rain and tornado warnings. I am very happy for the rain because we need it, that's for sure. But, I really, really wanted to go work through our list of photo requests today. Our last two trips out to this particular cemetery, we didn't find any of the people on our list. It will still be too squishy to go out there tomorrow, but I hope by Friday we can try again.

Five Minute Friday: Vivid

Please click the button above and be prepared to be inspired by The Gypsy Mama's writing. Join the rest of us as we write life five minutes at a time, unedited.

This week's prompt is: Vivid.
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Sometimes rainbows are bright and vivid and it is easy to see their beauty. Other times they are soft against the sky and you have to struggle to see them. Their beauty isn't fully realized by our weak, human eyes, but it is still present. We have to gaze past the clouds, into the darkness, and see with our hearts what our eyes don't comprehend.

It is very easy to find joy when the beauty doesn't take a struggle to see. It takes a realization that beauty goes so much deeper than what a fleeting glance can easily grasp and into the depths of the soul to find true happiness. It is in our hearts before it is in our eyes.

Wednesday Hodgepodge

Please click the button above to join Joyce at From This Side of the Pond for Wednesday Hodgepodge!

1. A new Miss America was crowned on Saturday night-did you watch? If you were a contestant what would your talent be?

No, I do not generally watch beauty pageants. The talent that I seem to have the most is ticking people off. A more positive talent, I guess, would be making something out of nothing. My husband says that I'm very good at that.

2. Do you have houseplants? Real or fake?

Does a dead poinsettia count? I do not generally have flowers in the house unless I am planning to photograph them. That isn't very often these days.

3. When you were in school did you speak up or were you more of the hide your face, avoid eye contact, and pray the teacher didn't call on you type of student?

I was always hoping and praying that the teacher would forget that I existed. The thought of being in front of the class, giving oral reports, writing on the board, all of those things scared the heck out of me and made me sick. I'm still the same way.

4. Next Monday marks the Chinese New Year....what do you order when someone suggests Chinese food?

We never go anywhere for anyone to suggest Chinese food to me.

5. How would you define a miracle? What would it take for you to consider something a miracle?

To me, a miracle is something good that has no possible way of happening, but it does anyway. For example, going to bed the night before Thanksgiving with no food in the house and waking up to people at your door the next morning with more groceries than your kitchen can contain.

6. What's your favorite Disney song? If you're stuck you'll find a list here

This is one of my favorites: Beauty and the Beast

7. I should have __________yesterday.

I should have walked through a section of the graveyard looking for some of the names on our list of markers to photograph, but it was just a lazy day all around.

8. Insert your own random thought here.

I am excited to find a relative online (that I never knew existed) that is every bit as excited about genealogy work as I am. She's got information that I didn't have; I have information that she didn't have and so we're both getting to grow our family trees a little more and maybe we'll be able to knock down a few brick walls in the process. I am very happy to have found her!

Five Minute Friday: Awake

Please click the button above and be prepared to be inspired by The Gypsy Mama's writing. Join the rest of us as we write life five minutes at a time, unedited.

This week's prompt is: Awake.

Awake. That's what I am most of the time, a walking zombie. I can't sleep, really sleep, because the bad dreams are there where sleep should be. If I do fall asleep, they follow me into the waking, along with the reminders of just what happens if I am down for more than six hours at a time. Awake and in pain, physically and otherwise.

Awake, what I want to be, fully awake to enjoy the time that I have left. Awake when everyone else is and fully alert, letting the pain sleep for a change.

I want to be awake and alert and right there in the moment when the bridge is finally crossed, when what I'm looking for is once and for all found.

Wednesday Hodgepodge

1. Lake Superior University has once again banished a list of words/phrases they think should be banished from the Queen's English in 2012-

amazing, baby bump, shared sacrifice, occupy, blowback, man cave, the new normal, pet parent, win the future, ginormous, trickeration and thank you in advance.

Which of these words/phrases would you most like to see banished from everyday speech and why. Go here to read more about how the words were chosen.


I think the term "baby bump" is cute, so that one can stay. Of the choices given, I guess I would say get rid of shared sacrifice. Generally, they aren't truly "shared" and certainly not in the political realm.

2. Are you easily embarrassed?

YES! There are things that some folks think are totally hilarious, but they embarrass me something awful. There are some folks that I think are the happiest when they are being a goof ball *because* they know it is embarrassing me.

3. What is your go-to snack?

If I could afford it on a regular basis, shrimp would be the answer here. Shrimp fixes everything. But, for now, it is peanut butter crackers.

4. Have you ever been to Washington DC? If not, do you have any desire to go? What site/attraction would you most like to see in that city? If you have been, what's your favorite site?

I've never been to Washington DC, but I would love to go to see the Jefferson Memorial.

5. Sit ups-planks-lunges-squats-which one do you hate the least?

I don't really particularly like any of them, but sit-ups would win the most hated slot. I don't know what "planks" are, so squats or lunges would get the "least hated" spot.

6. What's a small act of kindness someone did for you that you've never forgotten?

When I was in elementary school, a girl shared her lunch with me and was my friend. In high school, my US History teacher mailed letters for me because I couldn't get to the post office. These were letters to my then-future husband.

7. Have you ever been a blood donor?

I have tried on several occasions to be a blood donor. Each time that I've gone, they have rejected me. Each time that I've gone, I've found out that I was pregnant. Now, I can no longer have babies, but am anemic, so not a good candidate for giving blood.

8. Insert your own random thought here.

Love is a hard-to-figure thing. It shows up when you aren't looking for it and disappears when you are. It either is or it isn't. You can't make it be any more than you can make it not be.

Wednesday Hodgepodge

Please click the button above to join the fun over at Joyce's place!

Here are this week's questions:

1. What are three words you would use to describe your 2011?

Way too busy! I have driven over 21,000 miles in the last 9 months. But, it was a good kind of busy most of the time. I am enjoying driving my li'l zoom-zoom.

2. Do you like shrimp? What's your favorite way to have it prepared?

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE shrimp! It is my favorite food, breakfast, lunch, or supper. I would even count it as a dessert. haha I like it fried, as a cocktail, grilled, scampied. I have never met a shrimp I didn't like!

3. Is your house de-Christmased? If so, when did you tackle that job? If not, when will the decorations come down?

The tree stays up all year around here.

4. Do you like to watch scary movies?

I used to love watching scary movies, but since I almost died, they unnerve me too much. I can deal with mild spooky, but spooky on a spiritual level (as in with demons and such), I just can't handle those anymore. They cause panic attacks and this isn't even just modern movies. We tried to watch "Angel on My Shoulder" and we had to abort mission because I just couldn't take it. I know, I'm a wimp.

5. ice skating~sledding~skiing~snowboarding~of the four listed which wintertime activity do you most enjoy?

I've never done any of them, unless sliding down a little hill on a flattened cardboard box counts as sledding. Of the choices given, I would love to be able to ice skate. At this point in my life, however, it just isn't going to happen.

6. Did you have a childhood hideout? Describe it.

I lived in the woods. I don't know that it was so much of a hideout; it was just fun. I don't recall having anywhere that I actually went to hide.

7. What's a place or space that motivates you?

I know it will sound weird, but cemeteries motivate me. There I am, face to face with mortality and untold stories, and it revs me up to continue the research that I've spent the last thirty years working on. I want to find out as much as I can about my family and my husband's family before I, too, am lying under one of those stones with just my name and vital dates to show for it. I want my descendants to know what filled the dash.

8. Insert your own random thought here.

This year will not be without its challenges. I hope that I can knock them out, one day at a time. That is all that I have to do, make it just one more day, and then one more day. He is with me, however many days it takes.

Happy New Year!

Saturday 9: Happy New Year!

I want to wish all of you a wonderful New Year, filled with hope, happiness, and love.




Saturday 9's questions this week are as follows:

1. Over all, how do you feel about what happened in your life in 2011?

Honestly? I'll be glad to see this year behind me. Some parts of the year were great, some goals were met. Other areas still need a lot of work! It has been an exhausting year on many levels.

2. Do you do New Year's resolutions? If so, what are they this year?

I don't do resolutions. I have goals, but those goals are subject to change as other things in my life change.

3. In the past 24 hours, I have reconnected with 3 old friends that I've not spoken to in years. If you could reconnect with someone from your past who would it be, and why?

I would like to know what happened to my friend Allison from elementary school. We were best buddies way back then. I left for private school after sixth grade and I don't know what ever became of her. She was a very kind, giving girl.

4. Do you have anything that you would have not done or done differently in 2011 as you look back?

Yes, but the list is way too long to put here. But, for starters, I wouldn't have gone so off course with food choices. I was making good progress with the vegan idea, but fell to temptation and haven't found my way back yet.

5. Going back to my ex-friends that I reconnected with, one of them ended over a boyfriend. She called to apologize. Do you have someone that you fell out with you and wonder how they are?

No one comes immediately to mind.

6. If you had a chance to reconnect with an ex (say for coffee), who would it be, and why?

There are no ex-boyfriends for me. The boy that I liked before I started dating my husband was killed in an accident and we weren't boyfriend/girlfriend. He was just a boy that I liked.

7. One of resolutions is about weight-loss. Have you ever struggled with your diet?

No struggle, really. Either I follow it or I don't. It isn't really a diet, per se, but a lifestyle choice. I am working my way back to vegan, though very slowly at this point.

8. What do you think was the top news story of 2011?

Overall for the world, I have no idea. For me, I guess it would be the earthquake in New Zealand. I still haven't heard from my friend down there. I can only hope and pray that she is OK. I saw yesterday that they've had another one down there.

9. What are your plans for (New Year's Eve) tonight?

My husband and I have watched the ball drop via Dick Clark's New Year's Rocking Eve every year that we've been together, with exception of the switch from 1981 to 1982. I was sixteen years old and in the hospital for a tonsillectomy then and they wouldn't let him stay in my room to ring in the new year. We usually watch it on television, but tonight we'll be watching it online. We will have sparkling grape juice with the kids, clink our glasses (and hopefully not break them!), hope for a better year, and then get on with life.
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Happy New Year to all of you!

Five Minute Friday: Open

Please click the button above and be prepared to be inspired by The Gypsy Mama's writing. Join the rest of us as we write life five minutes at a time, unedited.
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I opened the car door filled with both excitement and dread, not knowing what was before me. The drive would be over a thousand miles long...would I be able to do that?

I did and have never gone back.

That day simultaneously closed one part of my life and opened yet another and now I'd give just about anything to go back to the way that it was before I opened that car door, before my husband picked up the telephone, answering a call that changed our family forever.

There have been many openings and closings over the last seven years. I know that there are more ahead, though I don't know what they will involve, what will be waiting on the other side.

As 2011 sneaks away and 2012 is ready to pounce, I am hoping that this new year offers more openings than closings, more gains than losses, more open hearts, more love and laughter.

I hope this for all of us. May 2012 bring you days full of laughter, love, and blessings from our Heavenly Father.

Happy New Year!

Wednesday Hodgepodge

Please click on the button above to join Joyce's Wednesday Hodgepodge fun!

1. Share something you loved about your Christmas day.

I loved having absolutely no reason to have to leave the house. We didn't have any jobs to do, the stores were closed (at least the ones that usually suck us in at least once a day!) and it was just a fine day of relaxing with nowhere to have to be.

2. You get to put five items in a time capsule to be opened in 100 years, what items would you choose and why?

First: I would start with a copy of my genealogy research so that future generations wouldn't have to fight the same battles that I've had to fight to get it.

Second: I would include copies of my pictures along with an index of who the people/places are in those photos.

Third: I would want to make a blessing gown and outfit (one for a girl and one for a boy) so that my future grandchildren would have something that I made and it would have my stitched signature and the date I completed it.

Fourth: I would include a copy of Enya's version of Silent Night, called Oiche Chiun. However, I have no clue how music will be formatted in the future, so maybe they'd just have to take me at my word that it is the most beautiful version of Silent Night in existence.




Fifth: And last, but not at all least, a letter telling those in the future about how important it is to have faith in Heavenly Father in ALL things, not just some things. We are not promised an easy life, but if we keep the faith and persevere, happiness is waiting for us on the other side. No matter what is happening, we just need to make it one more day...I don't know what tomorrow holds, but I know Who holds tomorrow.

3. What do you like on a cracker?

I like several things on cracker, but not at the same time: peanut butter, cheese, seafood salad, and chicken salad.

4. Do you make resolutions? How'd that work out for you this past year?

No, I don't generally do resolutions. I have goals, but they are flexible and often change. Making resolutions is too much like setting it in stone.

5. What's a song or song lyric you'll associate with 2011?

My health battle isn't cancer, but like the song says, I just want to feel like a woman again and this is hard because of what surgery took from me. For those friends and acquaintances that have received the "c" diagnosis over this past year, this one's for you:



Jesus Take the Wheel...He's the only way this train will keep moving.




He's the only reason that I'm still here today.

6. How will you ring in the new year?

I will ring it in at home with my husband and remaining children, with sparkling grape juice and I'm not sure what else. I don't know if fireworks will be happening or not because I'm not sure if the burn ban is still on or not.

7. What is something you look forward to in 2012?

Although "freedom" was my word for 2011, it is my goal for 2012 as well. I won't go into details on that one. Also, I look forward to more family tree discoveries.

8. Insert your own random thought here.

Childhood cancer is on my mind. It stinks. They shouldn't have to fight such things...and we shouldn't have to bury our babies.




For those still fighting, like Kate and Braden and so many others, please pray for them. For those little heroes that have gone on to Heaven, please remember their grieving families in your prayers. There's a cure out there somewhere and He's still in the miracle business. Please support the fight to end childhood cancer!


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Happy New Year, everybody!