Five Minute Friday: Tired

Each week, we write for five minutes on a given prompt. We don't stop to edit; we just write, whether it is right or not. So, find those home keys or your favorite pen and join us over at The Gypsy Mama's blog for five minutes of unrestrained writing.


This week's five minutes is about: Tired
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Tired. Heart-tired, brain-tired, that's what I am. And the non-stop questioning is making someone else tired. I can't let go or heal without answers nor without logic and some things defy logic. I'm tired of trying and tired of nothing ever being right no matter which way I turn. I'm tired of blow-ups and tired of "fake it till you make it" and failing at even that.

I'm tired of books that promise answers, but only cause more questions, questions that no one seems to be equipped or willing to answer and just get frustrated with me asking. I'm tired of blind acceptance being expected of me.

I'm tired of sleep that brings no rest. I'm tired of daytime fears becoming night-time realities. I'm tired of being tried and left behind no matter what I try. I'm also tired of negative feelings and trying to find a reason not to have them.

I'm tired of things being billed as my "choice" when I didn't, and don't, have a choice in the matter. I didn't choose this; it just is.

Mostly, I'm just tired, period. I wish that I had gone Home when I had the chance. I'm tired of time away from those that truly loved me and there's only one way that I will see them again outside of dreamland. There's only one cure for this kind of tired and only One that can offer this rest.

I'm tired of waiting.