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I didn't get to be there for the last farewell. I was over a thousand miles away when I should have been home. I needed to be here. I needed to be there. I couldn't be two places at once and my heart was split in two.
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Rest in peace, Daddy. |
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Disclaimer: These Filipino word images are from an article by Isabelle Laureta on BuzzFeed titled “36 Of The Most Beautiful Words In The Philippine Language”. All credit goes to them.
Posts
I know you were torn. I wish we could have been there and not at the nursing home. I love you.
ReplyDeleteI don't blame you for this. It was what it was, just another lesson somehow. I love you.
DeleteI am sorry you couldn't be there, that must have been very hard.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Ellen.
DeleteYes, it was very hard. Guilt is here, too. I was there for David's daddy's funeral, but not for my own daddy. I try not to think about that because it will drive me crazy if I think about it too long, but sometimes it happens.
Had I gone to be with Daddy and then David died while I was gone, I couldn't have lived with myself then either. David was in a nursing home at the time recovering from a necrotic toe that nearly killed him. It was amputated because it was too far gone to save. I know it sounds like a big baby talking, but it seems most unfair to have two of the most important men in your life on death's door at the same time, over a thousand miles apart.
I still have David and for that, I am thankful. Another friend of ours was on her way with her husband to bury her daddy and her husband died on the way there. How horrible...so excruciatingly painful. :(
Thank you again. Have a blessed day.