Hurting and Forgiving

To those that have hurt me: I forgive you.

I cannot promise that I will never bring it up again because, just as getting your driver's license or having that transplant or getting fired from a job you loved made you who you are, what you did to me made me the person that stands before you today.

I cannot promise to forget. I am only human and what you did shook the very foundations of my being, not just my heart, but down deep in my soul. Your actions toward me, compounded with years of other hurts, created in me a feeling of rejection by the One Who promised to never abandon me.

You made me doubt not only your love, but His love.

I cannot trust you...yet.

I am a faulty human, too. I cannot find a how-to formula for the exact path to forgiveness. They tell me that forgiveness is a choice, not a feeling. I'm not so sure about that, but I know that it is a command.

So, with that thought in mind, if not fully in my heart yet, I say these words to you: I forgive you.

Because, in the end, regardless of what you do or say to me, no matter how you hurt me, He is the One that holds my heart and He will never break it.